A Letter To My Younger Self

This one is for the younger part of me that has suffered, but also for the young, dear children of the world. My prayer is they can learn from my story.

Dear Mariah,

How are you? Are you struggling? Do you feel like you are comparing yourself to people around you?

Starting at 6 years old you were struggling. Poor girl, if only you realized how pretty inside and out you were! You compared yourself to others in all sorts of ways!! Grades, clothes, who was friends with who, how you looked in your cheer uniforms. The need to be “perfect” was so overwhelming, wasn’t it? And poor thing this just continued…

Letter Child Kid

If only there could have been positive ways to really be noticed. You received some attention at home, but you needed more. You lost your childhood at such a young age and that didn’t help anything.

Teenager Fun

Growing up so fast and realizing what the world is really like was so hard! Going from a young kid to an old soul teenager in a short time was rough. Basically a real life version of 13 going on 30! It’s like you missed the time of nurturing and really figuring out what makes you so special, what your real talents are. Why you are you!!! And the sad part is, the real you is so special!!!

You only realize how powerful you are in your DIFFERENCES from others

I just wish I could have helped you more back in the day. Especially through high school during the bullying, trauma, and awful things that happened. Sadly, I just didn’t know how, but I did the best I could.

Looking back can you believe where you are now? You knew you were determined and had a crazy strong head on your shoulders, but really?!!! Have a career, husband, doggies, and luckily just be somewhat stable! It’s unimaginable coming from where you were even ten years ago!

In ten years, I can’t imagine how much further you will go! Stay strong my sweet angel. Know that I am always in your corner and fighting to protect you. Even when I fail, I will rise up and do better!

I will always try and do my best to protect you, but can you forgive me for the past?

Love,

Mariah


I wondered if that was how forgiveness budded; not with the fanfare of epiphany, but with pain gathering its things, packing up, and slipping away unannounced in the middle of the night.
— Khaled Hosseini, in The Kite Runner (Art: “Love From Up Above” by Amanda Cass).


Join me in conversation about all things mental health. Click below and never miss a blog again!